The opening day of a General Assembly session is a scene of barely controlled chaos. Members rush around getting signatures of copatrons on their bills before the 10 a.m. filing deadline. Staff assistants dig through boxes and struggle to get offices set up in working order. New pages and interns try to figure out why the elevators in the General Assembly Building don’t all go to the same floors.

This year will be different, it seems. We’ve decided to take a break from the hustle and bustle of Richmond.

We’re going to Jamestown. On a bus.

Last week the Joint Rules Committee decided to help launch the 400th anniversary celebration of the landing at Jamestown by visiting the site on opening day. So at noon on January 10 we’ll hold our House and Senate sessions in Richmond. Then all 140 of us will pile onto buses and journey 50 miles down the road to Jamestown. There, Governor Kaine will deliver his State of the Commonwealth Address. Vice President Cheney has been invited along to lend some sparkle to the occasion. When we’re done with the festivities, we’ll climb back on the buses and come home.

The last time a lot of us went on a field trip like this was during high school, and we’ve forgotten what you do to make the time pass. So Kris and I have come up with our list of

THE TOP 10 THINGS TO DO ON THE WAY TO JAMESTOWN

10.  Every time you spot a roadside sign with a superfluous “E” (“Jamestowne,” “Shoppe,” etc.), pull over, take a Magic Marker, and E-rase it.

9.  Tell the freshmen that under General Assembly Road Trip Rules, they ride in the luggage compartment.

8.  Speaker leads us in “100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.”

7.  Karaoke contest with the entries to the Virginia State Song competition.

6.  Tie Englin’s shoelaces together and steal his lunch money.

5.  Check out the congestion on I-64, and wonder aloud why nobody’s done anything about it.

4.  When Jack Reid asks to hang his vest on the coathook next to your seat, tell him it’s taken.

3.  If it’s a fancy bus with a restroom in the back, give somebody a swirlie.

2.  Agree with the bus driver that Bobby Orrock’s HB 70 was the best darned bill of the 2006 Session — otherwise, you walk home.

1.  If you see Jack Reid and Dick Cheney having words in the aisle — DUCK!